MINDFULESS FOR BEGINNERS
An old Cherokee is teaching his grandson about life. “A fight is going on inside me,” he said to the boy. “It is a terrible fight and it is between two wolves. One is evil–he is anger,envy, sorrow, regret, greed, arrogance, self-pity, guilt, resentment, inferiority, lies, false pride, superiority, and ego." He continued,“The other is good–he is joy, peace, love, hope, serenity, humility, kindness, benevolence, empathy, generosity, truth, compassion, and faith. The same fight is going on inside you– and inside every other person, too.” The grandson thought about it for a minute and then asked his grandfather, “Which wolf will win?” The old Cherokee simply replied, “The one you feed.”
This story highlights the importance of mindfulness and its opposite - mindlessness.
First, what is mindfulness?
Jon Kabat Zinn defines mindfulness as “paying attention in a particular way; on purpose; in the present moment; non-judgmentally”. Said another way– it means we are aware of our thoughts, feelings, body sensations, and surrounding environment without judging what we find as if there is a “right” way to feel in any given moment.
Mindfulness is truly a superpower and here’s why: it empowers us to respond rather than react. Mindfulness allows us to see our thoughts and feelings as they are beginning. It is very powerful to know how we are feeling, as we are feeling it; to know what we are thinking, as we are thinking it. Mindfulness creates space between 'us’ and our thoughts, feelings, and emotions. The good news is, that space means we have more choice and more time to choose how and why we respond in a particular way.
When we are not being mindful, we are caught in mindlessness– or autopilot. We all know autopilot. Have you ever driven somewhere and not remembered the car ride? Stepping into autopilot mode is like stepping out of the driver's seat and letting our thoughts, judgments, and emotions drive instead.
Okay, so how does mindfulness work?
Our brain is complex and about 90% of the activity of the mind occurs below our awareness. So even though you might assume you are in total control of yourself, modern science is suggesting it isn’t actually that simple.
Mindfulness ‘works’ because of the concept of neuroplasticity. Neuroplasticity means that our mind is constantly being shaped throughout our lives by our experiences and our thoughts. In sum, what we focus our attention on determines how our mind is shaped. I was always told, ‘neurons that fire together, wire together’. If we are caught up in a cycle of worry, for example, we are becoming really good at worrying. If we are actively practicing focusing or being calm, we are going to become good at it. The neurons that fire together will wire together and become stronger.
In practicing mindfulness we are taking a very active role in the shaping of our mind, in the same way going to the gym changes the shape of our bodies. Practicing mindfulness helps regulate our nervous systems by fine-tuning our awareness for the information we take in. This has to do with structures in the brain that are impacted by mindfulness. This often translates into the overall experience of less stress in day- to-day life.
Of course, we still experience moments of frustration, anger, irritability and the like even with practicing mindfulness. We know now though that a person recovers much faster when they are practicing mindfulness. Meaning, you get over what made you upset quicker. Which means you get to go about your life and focus on what’s really important to you.
Mindfulness works because it is a skill that can be developed by practice over time and is accessible to literally everyone. It works because it puts us back in the driver seat so we have more control over our actions and life. Who wouldn’t want that?!
I hope this was helpful as an introduction to mindfulness and its many, many uses. Drop me a line below or in my email if you want to chat more about it!
We heal together,
Cristen